I have to say that Jan thru May of 2011 has been pretty awful. My health stinks and life has been quite difficult. We need a vacation in the worst way. The good news is good friends, lots of prayers coming our way, good therapists to help us figure out how to handle all the twists and turns that life has in store for us. Hopefully I can post something more positive soon.
The boys are almost out of school. Swim lessons begin in June. They are free! James baseball season seems to be on permanent rain delay. No games have been played yet. I am trying to find inexpensive fun things to do that will not make my physical health worse. I am joining different websites trying to get those free coupons and great deals. I know God has a plan, but maybe I misread the directions, so I will post something again when I have a better idea where we are headed! Happy Spring.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Friday, January 7, 2011
Exhaustion
My goal in the past few months is to focus on the positive, not the negative. I'm trying, but this week has been so exhausting. I have been blessed and I know it, but I'm worn out in ways that are not easily described. My first blessing after Christmas was that I was able to visit with this amazing neurologist who is working on helping me with my physical health issues that I have been dealing with since last spring - Praise the Lord, I am so thankful. To get the right treatments many tests need to be ran. I was in and out constantly the entire week getting tests done.
School started Monday, the kids needed to go back and seem okay with it. I was sent an email that my student teaching started Monday, yea- praise! Then when I logged onto my school website, my course that goes with my student teaching was removed - STRESS! Then I had to explain the the teacher I am working with that I don't know if this is going to happen or not. This went on for 3 days - STRESS! John now needs to be in Latchkey so I can be at the school with the teachers by 8:15. I have no money - STRESS! Thankfully after one of my doctor appointments this week I had time to run to Job and Family Services and get paperwork to apply for child care assistance - PRAISE!. I haven't had time to get it back to them while they are open - STRESS! It takes about a month to process the forms - STRESS! I am BROKE- STRESS! I have had a migraine every day this week. I haven't slept hardly at all the entire week - STRESS! My back is killing me! My schedule is back to super busy and I don't know how I am going to do it. I have so many appointments and meetings that conflict with my teaching schedule or the kids. Check that, I won't do it, God will - PRAISE!
So, I am trying not to focus on the negative, but the blessings. I have doctors working on fixing my health issues! I am in a classroom and my advisor is trying to get all the knots out of my situation so that I can continue without issue in student teaching. I am supposed to graduate with my Masters degree in May! (I am ignoring the $225.00 that school wants in 18 days to apply for graduation.) My kids are healthy. I still have a roof over our head and utilities on. I have great friends and a great support system. After the week I had I almost didn't go to my Small group Bible study, but I tried to give it to God and enjoy myself, and I did. I had some really relaxing and happy moments and I am glad I went. I am tired, but I'm going to bed tonight thanking God for working on my praises and answering my prayers. No matter what, I am going to graduate this year with my masters degree. I feel that God is at work in my life, and somehow it will all work out.
Tomorrow is John's first Upward basketball game this season. James is back to Saturday school. I have homework to do, lots of housework to do. The snow needs shoveled. I need to spend time with my kids enjoying each other. I need sleep. I need to go to church. It would be nice to see my parents and my sister's family. I haven't seen anyone since Christmas Eve, really. All in all, I could complain, but what's the point? God has honored me and answered prayers and I am thankful and I know He will give me the rest I need when I am fully able to give Him the stress he can handle for me. I try way too hard to be Dependable Super Woman that can be a full time single parent with children with their own special requirements and be a great daughter and aunt and sister and student and employee. I am really thankful that I love my part time job, because my exhaustion wouldn't handle it with a job I didn't enjoy.
So, Happy New Year, try to be positive, say your prayers, but remember to be thankful for your blessings. Give your hectic schedule and stress to the One who wants it - Jesus! Amen - Dena
School started Monday, the kids needed to go back and seem okay with it. I was sent an email that my student teaching started Monday, yea- praise! Then when I logged onto my school website, my course that goes with my student teaching was removed - STRESS! Then I had to explain the the teacher I am working with that I don't know if this is going to happen or not. This went on for 3 days - STRESS! John now needs to be in Latchkey so I can be at the school with the teachers by 8:15. I have no money - STRESS! Thankfully after one of my doctor appointments this week I had time to run to Job and Family Services and get paperwork to apply for child care assistance - PRAISE!. I haven't had time to get it back to them while they are open - STRESS! It takes about a month to process the forms - STRESS! I am BROKE- STRESS! I have had a migraine every day this week. I haven't slept hardly at all the entire week - STRESS! My back is killing me! My schedule is back to super busy and I don't know how I am going to do it. I have so many appointments and meetings that conflict with my teaching schedule or the kids. Check that, I won't do it, God will - PRAISE!
So, I am trying not to focus on the negative, but the blessings. I have doctors working on fixing my health issues! I am in a classroom and my advisor is trying to get all the knots out of my situation so that I can continue without issue in student teaching. I am supposed to graduate with my Masters degree in May! (I am ignoring the $225.00 that school wants in 18 days to apply for graduation.) My kids are healthy. I still have a roof over our head and utilities on. I have great friends and a great support system. After the week I had I almost didn't go to my Small group Bible study, but I tried to give it to God and enjoy myself, and I did. I had some really relaxing and happy moments and I am glad I went. I am tired, but I'm going to bed tonight thanking God for working on my praises and answering my prayers. No matter what, I am going to graduate this year with my masters degree. I feel that God is at work in my life, and somehow it will all work out.
Tomorrow is John's first Upward basketball game this season. James is back to Saturday school. I have homework to do, lots of housework to do. The snow needs shoveled. I need to spend time with my kids enjoying each other. I need sleep. I need to go to church. It would be nice to see my parents and my sister's family. I haven't seen anyone since Christmas Eve, really. All in all, I could complain, but what's the point? God has honored me and answered prayers and I am thankful and I know He will give me the rest I need when I am fully able to give Him the stress he can handle for me. I try way too hard to be Dependable Super Woman that can be a full time single parent with children with their own special requirements and be a great daughter and aunt and sister and student and employee. I am really thankful that I love my part time job, because my exhaustion wouldn't handle it with a job I didn't enjoy.
So, Happy New Year, try to be positive, say your prayers, but remember to be thankful for your blessings. Give your hectic schedule and stress to the One who wants it - Jesus! Amen - Dena
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Christmas Day is ending
It's late on Christmas day. I love Christmas and I am always sad to see it go, but as many of us mothers' know, Christmas time is exhausting! I love that I get to share with the kids a lot of wonderful memories. I love riding around to look at Christmas lights. I love taking them to the same Santa and getting their picture each year. I love reading Twas the Night Before Christmas to them. I love reading to them about the story of Jesus birth. I love getting joy out of making them joyful. I enjoy Christmas Eve service and the Grace God bestows on us. I love getting to share God's message. However, it is exhausting! I just put so much pressure on trying to bake goodies for friends and get out cards with a picture of the kids and finding the right gift at the right price, and everything else that "Supermom" does, that I have worn myself out.
I want to go to church tomorrow and not need to rush to get everything done. Sunday I hope to go to church, have a nice lunch at home with the kids, watch them play their new Wii, and take a nap. If I get energetic, I hope to go to see the new Narnia and Yogi movie with the boys and my Dad and my nephew in the next few days. Monday is the much anticipated Neurology appointment. I just hope they can figure out exactly what is not working correctly and how to fix it. Tuesday I am getting my first mammogram and my ultra sound on my neck to check for blockage. I also need to see the dentist before school starts. I am scheduled to begin student teaching Jan. 3. Life is about to get even more busy. I think I need a few naps in the coming week. God is in my plan and it is helping me to try to remember the joy and not to reflect on the stressful things I have going on right now. My kids had a great Christmas thanks to friends from church and they were very happy with the gifts they received from their grandparents and aunt and uncle and cousins. Friends just topped out Christmas week. I was gratified to see many friends and spend some time with them on Christmas Eve. I really have great friends! I have an amazing church! Without both, Christmas gifts would have been much smaller to say the least. I also have an awesome family and extended family! So, through all the crazy hustle and bustle, I do remember the joy and I am getting better at giving "it" to God and beginning each day anew. I aim to go to bed each night thanking God for my blessings and I am trying to praise Him each morning and throughout the day. I am also trying to do it in front of my children even more often to help teach them this pattern. Writing this blog is helping me stay focused on the joy!
Happy New Year!
I want to go to church tomorrow and not need to rush to get everything done. Sunday I hope to go to church, have a nice lunch at home with the kids, watch them play their new Wii, and take a nap. If I get energetic, I hope to go to see the new Narnia and Yogi movie with the boys and my Dad and my nephew in the next few days. Monday is the much anticipated Neurology appointment. I just hope they can figure out exactly what is not working correctly and how to fix it. Tuesday I am getting my first mammogram and my ultra sound on my neck to check for blockage. I also need to see the dentist before school starts. I am scheduled to begin student teaching Jan. 3. Life is about to get even more busy. I think I need a few naps in the coming week. God is in my plan and it is helping me to try to remember the joy and not to reflect on the stressful things I have going on right now. My kids had a great Christmas thanks to friends from church and they were very happy with the gifts they received from their grandparents and aunt and uncle and cousins. Friends just topped out Christmas week. I was gratified to see many friends and spend some time with them on Christmas Eve. I really have great friends! I have an amazing church! Without both, Christmas gifts would have been much smaller to say the least. I also have an awesome family and extended family! So, through all the crazy hustle and bustle, I do remember the joy and I am getting better at giving "it" to God and beginning each day anew. I aim to go to bed each night thanking God for my blessings and I am trying to praise Him each morning and throughout the day. I am also trying to do it in front of my children even more often to help teach them this pattern. Writing this blog is helping me stay focused on the joy!
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 20, 2010
Middle of December, 2010
Hello family and friends,
This month has been so busy, it just seems to have flown by. The accomplishments of the week, shopping, baking, school is out for Christmas break...
The highlights of the week: John's 2nd grade class went to see the Nutcracker Thursday. He is still talking about it and loved it! We bought Nutcracers for a few family friends that he picked out! What a treat and wonderful memory!
Happy Highlight: James reminded me that Friday is the anniversary 5 years ago that he asked me if he could call me Mom! Still brings tears to my eyes when I think of it!
More highlights: My friends at small group from church watched the boys for me and I went to Holy Spirit Empowerment Night Friday night, it was awesome! I felt so much better when I left. God and I needed time to regroup without the boys and daily stuff to clog up the connection. It was fantasitc and I hope to do it more often!
My shopping is finished, yea! We met up with Mom and Dad Saturday afternoon at Toys R Us and went to dinner at Red Robin, YUM!
The best highlight: Sunday, the boys and my niece were baptised at Mom's church by her pastor and dear friend, Rev. Nancy. It was so awesome. John said he felt clean from the inside out afterward! It was such a wonderful blessing! John has been wanting to be batised at our church for some time, but he needs to be 10 years old there. James hasn't wanted to do it at our church because there are thousands of viewers and he'd be a little uncomfortable. This worked out great! Another happy date to remember in December.
We went out to lunch afterwards to celebrate with the whole family and my niece's grandparents as well. That was fun! My nephew came with us and we spent the day at my parents house, watched movies on TV and Prancer was a favorite. The boys played great together. They had a good day. I made cornflake cookies for us and Mom and I made potato soup and it was so yummy. It was a great day.
And today, I finally mailed my Christmas cards. Then, again later than it should have been, the boys and I put out Christmas lights outside. I also found out this week that I passed my Praxis II test for Special Ed. It's the one that you must pass to teach. If not for a friend, I would have forgotten to check on it, it's been out there for a few weeks. Only one more test to take since my grad school is in Arizona, I have to take another Praxis exam in March.
The tree is up, some gifts are wrapped, cards are finished, now I just need to finish some papers for grad school and all will be well in the world. Snow Snow and more Snow coming this week. When I finish my school work the boys and I will do more baking for our neighbors and take that around. We plan on going to a few movies over Christmas vacation (Narnia, Yogi, etc). I am scheduled to begin student teaching January 3. I pray it goes off without a bump in the road.
More good news, the neurology department at OSU Medical Center called today and moved up my appointment to Monday Dec. 27! YEA! Another prayer answered!
So, all in all, things are looking up. This year has been very tough, but we have survived. If we can find out how to eliminate my health issues and school finishes as planned, wow, how wonderful that will be....
Merry Christmas!
This month has been so busy, it just seems to have flown by. The accomplishments of the week, shopping, baking, school is out for Christmas break...
The highlights of the week: John's 2nd grade class went to see the Nutcracker Thursday. He is still talking about it and loved it! We bought Nutcracers for a few family friends that he picked out! What a treat and wonderful memory!
Happy Highlight: James reminded me that Friday is the anniversary 5 years ago that he asked me if he could call me Mom! Still brings tears to my eyes when I think of it!
More highlights: My friends at small group from church watched the boys for me and I went to Holy Spirit Empowerment Night Friday night, it was awesome! I felt so much better when I left. God and I needed time to regroup without the boys and daily stuff to clog up the connection. It was fantasitc and I hope to do it more often!
My shopping is finished, yea! We met up with Mom and Dad Saturday afternoon at Toys R Us and went to dinner at Red Robin, YUM!
The best highlight: Sunday, the boys and my niece were baptised at Mom's church by her pastor and dear friend, Rev. Nancy. It was so awesome. John said he felt clean from the inside out afterward! It was such a wonderful blessing! John has been wanting to be batised at our church for some time, but he needs to be 10 years old there. James hasn't wanted to do it at our church because there are thousands of viewers and he'd be a little uncomfortable. This worked out great! Another happy date to remember in December.
We went out to lunch afterwards to celebrate with the whole family and my niece's grandparents as well. That was fun! My nephew came with us and we spent the day at my parents house, watched movies on TV and Prancer was a favorite. The boys played great together. They had a good day. I made cornflake cookies for us and Mom and I made potato soup and it was so yummy. It was a great day.
And today, I finally mailed my Christmas cards. Then, again later than it should have been, the boys and I put out Christmas lights outside. I also found out this week that I passed my Praxis II test for Special Ed. It's the one that you must pass to teach. If not for a friend, I would have forgotten to check on it, it's been out there for a few weeks. Only one more test to take since my grad school is in Arizona, I have to take another Praxis exam in March.
The tree is up, some gifts are wrapped, cards are finished, now I just need to finish some papers for grad school and all will be well in the world. Snow Snow and more Snow coming this week. When I finish my school work the boys and I will do more baking for our neighbors and take that around. We plan on going to a few movies over Christmas vacation (Narnia, Yogi, etc). I am scheduled to begin student teaching January 3. I pray it goes off without a bump in the road.
More good news, the neurology department at OSU Medical Center called today and moved up my appointment to Monday Dec. 27! YEA! Another prayer answered!
So, all in all, things are looking up. This year has been very tough, but we have survived. If we can find out how to eliminate my health issues and school finishes as planned, wow, how wonderful that will be....
Merry Christmas!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
My life
Hi world, my name is Dena. I am a single mother of two boys. I became their foster mother in 2005 and then their adoptive mother. The boys are in 7th grade and 2nd grade. Their names are James and John. I went to college to be a teacher, but decided to be a professional nanny instead. Six years later I decided to change careers because my personal life was a mess. I was told it would be very difficult to have kids. I went into the payroll industry and did this for the next 11 years. During this time I decided to foster and adopt because my dating life was not going anywhere, but my relationship with Jesus was stronger than ever. I truly believe that God put my boys in my life. I believe that we are following his plan, difficult and stressful as it may be.
As the economy has failed, so has the job market. Payroll is now often outsourced out of state or out of the country. One year I took a break from volunteering in the church nursery to help my son's Sunday school class. I worked with 4th graders and God opened my eyes to his plan, to go back to teaching. Since that time I have gone back to school to get my masters degree in special education.
This year has been a tough one for us, my health has not been great, the boys have issues, but with God, family, therapy and friends, we are making it.
My goal is to remind myself that although our life is stressful and challenging and downright difficult, God is in charge. If I can remind myself daily of this, then each day can begin anew. Welcome to my blog.
As the economy has failed, so has the job market. Payroll is now often outsourced out of state or out of the country. One year I took a break from volunteering in the church nursery to help my son's Sunday school class. I worked with 4th graders and God opened my eyes to his plan, to go back to teaching. Since that time I have gone back to school to get my masters degree in special education.
This year has been a tough one for us, my health has not been great, the boys have issues, but with God, family, therapy and friends, we are making it.
My goal is to remind myself that although our life is stressful and challenging and downright difficult, God is in charge. If I can remind myself daily of this, then each day can begin anew. Welcome to my blog.
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